Series 1: Balance of Power
"4,691 irradiated haggis."
"Good evening you stupid, stinking, festering, gimboid of a cat."
"What's this if its not a discussion? A diesel locomotive?"
"And on that day Lister, Satan will be skating to work."
"Don't give me excuses, give me my arm back. It's got tattoos. 'Candy'? 'Denmark forever'? Is this Petersen's arm, Holly? I've got the arm of a danish moron."
"Holly, you're absolutely gorgeous, handsome and delicious! Please tell him to stop it!"
"You've got the brains of diarrhea and the breeding of a maggot."
"Of course you're tense, you rectum-faced pigmy!"
"Smeg off, dishwasher breath! You won't turn me back on."
"Uh, Holly, this is not my breast. I want my own nipple back."